March Gladness

Posted: March 20, 2014 in Bruce The Blog

DVDJ BA caricature at keyboard
Bruce the Blog
By Bruce Apar

For the past 11 springs, and for all the rest ahead, this is a week that weakens my heart yet strengthens my pride, my love, my resolve. Our Harrison departed March 21, 2003, the day after we celebrated his seemingly successful open heart surgery on my birthday.

Harrison + LL Cool J at SBXXXIII

Harrison thought it was real cool to meet LL Cool J at Super Bowl XXXIII in Miami in 1999.

While attending a black-tie dinner Friday evening, Dr. Thomas Spray had been called back to Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, and was working feverishly to revive our 15-year-old son, who, 24 hours after his trimphant exit from the operating room, had gone into cardiac arrest.

“Dr. Spray would like to see you now,” Harrison’s nurse said to Elyse and me, as held vigil in the lounge outside the Intensive Care Unit in the first hours of Sabbath. I had been praying fervently, desperately, siddur and skullcap in tow. The nurse’s approach ignited our anticipation. We jumped up, hoping to hear good news, but Elyse’s face recoiled in horror as the nurse, now walking us into the ICU, uttered the worst words imaginable: “I’m so sorry.”

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That’s not an easy question to answer unless you’re someone who opposes a sober living home. But Tom McCrossan, son Devon McCrossan and Mark McGoldrick of Compass Westchester explain to Bruce “The Blog” Apar and Frank J. Rich why they are establishing a sober living home in the pleasant middle-class burb of Yorktown Heights, New York, and how it will work.

Video  —  Posted: March 5, 2014 in Bruce The Blog
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New Year Revelations

Posted: December 29, 2013 in Bruce The Blog
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Success or Failure?Does your New Year resolve quickly dissolve into a puddle of promise unfulfilled?

It’s that time when the self-improvementniks among us resolve to make resolutions. Think about that word: re-solution. A chance to find new ways to do the right thing, and to do things right. A chance to reverse what you did not so well last year. A chance to make amends. A chance to change. A chance not to let bad things happen by chance, to assert your will to achieve, no matter how modest the victory. An effort to learn, and re-learn, from past mistakes.

It’s all, as they say, good. Or is it? Are resolutions really placebos? A form of self-foolery? A lazy cousin of “I think, therefore I am”? “I resolve, therefore I am a better person already!”

Come the dawn of a new year, less than half of Americans (40%) even bother to resolve anything. So reported Dan Diamond in a Jan. 1, 2013 article for Forbes Magazine ( He cited research from the University of Scranton that “just 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.” For everyone else, resolve dissolves into a puddle of promise unfulfilled.

If you extrapolate the above stats, among all Americans, 3.2% of us make whole on resolutions. For a proud people who boast of “exceptionalism,” not very exceptional. It’s not even pedestrian. It’s pathetic (this writer included; oh, I make ‘em with the best of ‘em, and I try hard to keep ‘em, and every so often come close, but a resolver’s work is never done.)

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